The Shyness Clinic

About Shyness and Social Anxiety

Research suggests that 40-60% of people consider themselves shy. Shyness as a temperament is not considered problematic, and may even be a strength, as those who are slow to warm up can be quite perceptive to the environment and to the concerns and feelings of others. Shyness can develop as a result of heredity and also environmental factors (like family environment and experiences at school). As an emotional experience, shyness is thought to combine fear with interest.

Social anxiety is not necessarily the same thing as shyness, although the two can co-exist. Social anxiety is nervousness or fear in social situations that is often accompanied by negative thoughts about the self or others as well as avoidance. Social anxiety is also a normal experience in that virtually everyone feels anxious in some social encounters. For about 10-16% of the population, social anxiety causes significant distress and interference with life goals (e.g., dating, friendships, and educational or occupational opportunities).

At the Shyness Clinic, we work with people who have various "levels" of shyness and social anxiety. Some people feel generally socially comfortable, but struggle, for example, to participate fully in work meetings due to negative thoughts about the self. Such people may benefit from a handful of focused individual sessions. Others have been shy and socially anxious since childhood and find that many life experiences have been significantly and negatively impacted by these issues. These people may choose either an individual or group approach to target the symptoms and make progress on goals that will get life moving in a more desired, effective direction.

Shyness Clinic Services

  • Initial Evaluation
    For those who are potentially interested in group therapy or who are unsure about how they wish to proceed with treatment, our 6-8 session assessment includes a structured interview, in-depth personality testing, and feedback on the assessment results. (Cost: $140 per 50-minute session)

  • Adult & Young Adult Groups
    Six-month structured therapy groups facilitated by a licensed psychologist that meet weekly for two-hour sessions involving no more than eight participants.  The focus of the groups is on understanding shyness, examining thinking patterns, social skills training, confrontation/negotiation skills training, etc.                                              (Cost: $90 per session)

  • Adolescent Groups
    Short term, cognitive-behavioral groups for socially anxious children and teens.
    (Cost: $90 per group session)

  • Individual Counseling for Adults and Adolescents
    Individual cognitive-behavioral sessions focusing on the personal psychological needs of the client. These may be scheduled weekly or as needed.
    (Cost: $140 per 50-minute session for sessions with a licensed psychologist. Individual counseling is also available to low income clients, including students, who may be seen on a sliding scale basis by supervised Ph.D. student therapists. We have one therapist who is bilingual in Japanese.)                               

  • Individual Telephone Consultations
    Individual weekly sessions with a shyness specialist for clients who are unable to participate in our on-site programs. Sessions include a structured interview designed to identify specific anxiety-producing behaviors, clarify goals, explore skills training, etc. Number of sessions determined by the client.
    (Cost: $140 per 50-minute session)

  • Brown Bag Lunch Drop-In
    First Wednesday of each month
    Bring your lunch and join us the first Wednesday of each month from 12-1PM for an introduction to the Social Fitness Model and the Shyness Clinic services. These meetings are held at The Shyness Clinic, 5150 El Camino Real, Building C/D, Suite C-21, in Los Altos.
    (No Cost)

Public Education Classes

The Shyness Clinic offers public education classes to help individuals improve their comfort level in social situations and to decrease stress:

 “Social Fitness”

  • Learn how to stop shyness from interfering with friendships, dating, career opportunities, and self-improvement

This course provides an overview of Dr. Henderson’s Social Fitness Model. Students learn how to examine their core beliefs and restructure negative thoughts. Structured discussions and role-play exercises are designed to address areas in which those who are socially anxious or shy commonly struggle.

Instructor: Amber Jenkins
Contact: (310) 383-8869

“Mindful Social Fitness”

  • Manage social stress with mindfulness training

  • Increase curiosity, openness, exploration, & willingness

  • Take small steps that accord with your values

  • Learn breathing exercises

This course will focus on learning to direct attention in the way that we choose. Mindfulness training offers stress-management skills and can enhance our interpersonal interactions and overall quality of life.

Instructor: Satoko Kimpara
Contact: (650) 224-6692

Background

The Shyness Clinic continues the pioneering work of Dr. Philip Zimbardo at Stanford University. The Stanford Shyness Clinic began in the late 1970's and offered the earliest comprehensive treatment program for shyness. In order to broaden the availability of these services, the Clinic was moved off-campus into the neighboring community of Palo Alto, and was renamed The Shyness Clinic. Since 1982, The Clinic has been headed by Dr. Lynne Henderson, a psychologist with thirty years of clinical experience. She developed the Social Fitness Model that is used in the Clinic today. Dr. Zimbardo currently serves as a research consultant.

In coordination with Dr. Lynne Henderson, the PGSP Kurt and Barbara Gronowski Clinic is now operating the Shyness Clinic as a specialty program.  The Shyness Clinic is an evidence-based group and individual treatment program for treating individuals with social anxiety, avoidant personality problems and shyness. The Shyness Clinic follows a "mental wellness" or "social fitness model" of treatment with a focus on encouraging participants to expand their current capabilities.

We collect a substantial amount of data to study our program’s effectiveness. The most research has been done on adult group outcomes, and we have found reductions in: shyness, depression, avoidance, self-blame, shame, negative thoughts about others, suppressed anger, and reported physiological anxiety. We have found increases in assertiveness and self-expression. Treatment gains appeared to be maintained in a 5-year follow-up study.

The Shyness Clinic is dedicated to the belief that shyness and social phobia do not have to interfere with achieving professional and interpersonal goals.  The pain of shyness can be relieved by challenging negative thoughts and beliefs, and learning new behaviors.  Participants at the Clinic have opportunities to learn and to try new behaviors in a safe and supportive environment

The services of The Shyness Clinic are offered to the entire San Francisco Bay Area through its office located in Los Altos, CA, approximately 45 miles south of San Francisco. Affiliated clinics include:

  • Director: Lynne Henderson, Ph.D.
  • Consultant: Philip Zimbardo, Ph.D.
  • Clinic Coordinator: Kathrine Gapinski, Ph.D.
  • Child/Adolescent Specialist: Nicole Shiloff, Ph.D.
  • Post: 5150 El Camino Real, Building C-2, Ste 22
    Los Altos, CA 94022
  • Telephone: (650) 961-9300

Treatment Program

Treatment at The Shyness Clinic addresses the following issues:

Cognition (how do I think?):

We work to identify and to change automatic thinking patterns that interfere with social interaction and social success.

Behavior (how do I act?):

We teach participants how to change behavior patterns that prevent them from reaching their life goals of friendship, marriage, and/or a rewarding work life.

Physical arousal (how do I stay calm?):

We help participants learn to regulate physical discomfort (e.g., racing heart, sweaty palms) when it interferes with social functioning, using physiological reactions to enhance performance.

Emotion (what do I feel?):

We help participants to reduce feelings of shame and guilt. We assist them in setting limits, claiming their voices, and getting their needs met.

Attribution style (whose fault is it?):

We help participants to learn to consider specific, temporary (situational), or external circumstances as factors in failures and to give themselves credit for successes.

Treatment Manuals

The Shyness Clinic follows The Social Fitness Model. This model and techniques for Getting Socially Fit are documented in the Social Fitness Manuals, a set of manuals on Social Fitness for therapists and clients is available for purchase through the Shyness Institute.

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The Kurt and Barbara Gronowski Psychology Clinic
5150 El Camino Real, Suite 22, Bldg C
Los Altos, California 94022
tel 650 961-9300
fax 650 961-9310